Three Ways to Build Self-Esteem

To fuel your self-esteem, I offer three suggestions.

Creative Visualization.
Use mental imagery to see yourself successfully engaged in sales situations or personal situations, embracing new behaviors. When you see yourself actually acting or thinking in a new way, you begin to let go of old programming. A new reality starts to take shape. For your reality to change, you must picture and accept yourself taking on the new behavior. Some mental preparation is required prior to thinking positively. The goal of visualization is to make the mental practice similar to the physical practice. We must think positively before we can act positively.

Visualization means "seeing success before it happens." See yourself on the podium prior to the event. By visualizing success, top achievers actually increase the chances of it happening. We move toward what we picture in our minds. A flushing of negative, self-defeating thoughts must occur before the mind can receive and act on new images of success. Athletes have been using the advantages of visualization for decades. They visualize the end result prior to the event itself. They develop a mental blueprint to get a clear image of what needs to be done. In his book, Advanced Selling Strategies, Brian Tracy talks about the value of a "mental rehearsal" prior to the sales call. He suggests that "Top sales athletes can use these same techniques as well to dramatically improve their performance in selling situations."

One of my earlier experiences with creative visualization was when I was teaching my daughter, Lynn, how to water ski on one ski. Her earlier slalom attempts had met with frustration and disappointment. She had fallen several times. (Not to mention that the gas gauge in the boat was falling as well.) We took a break and sat down on the dock and I asked her to close her eyes. I then walked her through a mental picture of success where she could see herself up on one ski. I had her confirm aloud what she saw and how she felt about it. Well, you guessed it. On her very next attempt, she got up on one ski. It worked! We were both elated. In fact, she almost fell again as she was filled with excitement and momentarily forgot what she was doing. As Lynn and countless others have discovered, creative visualization elevates your readiness to perform. Give yourself a competitive advantage.

Balance.
A balanced life is another way to foster self-esteem. Goals should not just be set in the area of business. No one has ever said on his or her deathbed, "I wish I had spent more time at the office." Top achievers set goals for all aspects of life. If not, they get out of balance and forget about other dimensions in their lives. The six components of a balanced life are family, health, work, spiritual, intellectual, and social. Examine each one and make time for the things and people that really count in your life. Successful people have come to appreciate the big picture and make a conscious commitment to personal development. They have learned that becoming a well-rounded person has as much to do with pursuits outside the office as with professional development. Success means having "passion pursuits" such as hobbies, personal interests, sports, or other extracurricular activities outside of work. These make for a well-rounded salesperson who doesn't live life as a couch potato, a mouse potato, or a spectator, but as a participant.

The downside is that without a balanced life, we fall into an activity trap, constantly on the go. We lose our perspective, our energy, and our sense of humor. Life is not that serious; let's take humor more seriously. Humor prevents hardening of the attitudes. Consider the mantra: Think fast, live slow.

Work complements your financial goals. To develop your financial goals I suggest you read David Chilton's book, The Wealthy Barber. He delivers excellent strategies to achieve your financial goals, all the while endorsing the KISS principle. David's book will also help you get out of financial quicksand. I'm sure everyone with maxed-out credit cards can relate, they spend themselves to wealth.

Read, Read, Read.
My final suggestion for maintaining high self-esteem is to read, read, read. Read other resources and materials, listen to audiotapes, attend seminars, and learn from successful people. You simply do not have enough time in life to make all the mistakes yourself. Learn from observing others. Don't go through life learning and training by trial and error. It's too expensive. As a friend once said to me, "Do as I say, not as I did." Consider this: if you think professional training is expensive, try ignorance. We cannot learn in isolation. The more intellectual inventory you acquire, the more resources you can draw on, and the better you will deal with daily challenges and stress. Strive to become mentally fit by feeding your mind with highly nutritious mental foods. Feed it mental protein instead of mental junk food like mindless television shows and radio gibberish. The average North American spends upwards of 22 hours a week in front of the television and 5–10 hours on the Internet. It wouldn't take that many hours with a good book to distance oneself from the pack. Many adults continue to live on a diet of mental pabulum, only digesting what is absolutely necessary, nothing more. What you take in today transcends into the person you become tomorrow.

Build your personal development library at a rate of one new book every month. I suggest you start by reading Dale Carnegie's classic, How to Win Friends & Influence People. It's a "must read" for people in all walks of life. To earn more, learn more.